i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
