the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize
