just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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