ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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