If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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