whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
