You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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