After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
