If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
