Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Randomize
