i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
