If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
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so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
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I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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