I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
