Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
home. puking in laundry basket.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
