OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
