i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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