New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
