apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
