I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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