after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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