Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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