the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize