addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Shame - the story of my life.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize