I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Randomize