just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
