Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Randomize
