Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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