too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
