Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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