Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize