One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
