i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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