We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
