Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(636): View more from Missouri

It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.

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(636): It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy. http://tfl.nu/hnmj

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(315): View more from New York

it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.

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(315): it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right. http://tfl.nu/vsow

Replies (10) Good night (978) Bad night (3252) Order T-Shirt
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(571): View more from Virginia

found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.

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(571): found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game. http://tfl.nu/h3cm

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(407): View more from Florida

shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.

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(407): shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands. http://tfl.nu/6i6m

Replies (22) Good night (753) Bad night (4479) Order T-Shirt
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(615): View more from Tennessee

took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now

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(615): took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now http://tfl.nu/5whe

Replies (7) Good night (1005) Bad night (2340) Order T-Shirt
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(614): View more from Ohio

ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund

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(614): ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund http://tfl.nu/czuk

Replies (8) Good night (2506) Bad night (1266) Order T-Shirt
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(940): View more from Texas

He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.

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(940): He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter. http://tfl.nu/rjmj

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(434): View more from Virginia

i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level

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(434): i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level http://tfl.nu/1fd3

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.

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(603): Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket. http://tfl.nu/e8ax

Replies (4) Good night (1885) Bad night (512) Order T-Shirt
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(209): View more from California

I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?

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(209): I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry? http://tfl.nu/5luf

Replies (15) Good night (466) Bad night (1329)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.

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(614): I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia. http://tfl.nu/a7rk

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."

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(405): Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin." http://tfl.nu/pbfg

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand

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(603): I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand http://tfl.nu/gtek

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(206): View more from Washington

He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.

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(206): He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years. http://tfl.nu/o48r

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.

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(+44): She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn. http://tfl.nu/qwtm

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