And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
