Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I think i got beer on your cat.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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