Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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