Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
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I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
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I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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