I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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