girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
