My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize