his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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