I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
