You surviving the open bar?
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There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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