my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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