so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
