alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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