Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
