I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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