some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
