It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm getting married
To pizza
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
